WADA considers official 'Lame Excuse' list

The World Anti-Doping Agency is considering a crackdown on athletes who come up with 'the dog ate my homework'-style reasons to explain away positive doping tests. According to documents obtained by Cyclingnews, WADA is set to recommend penalty increases between 50 and 100 percent for athletes who trot out the same tired old excuses when they return a positive test, if they are subsequently found guilty of a breach of anti-doping regulations.

WADA's list - officially dubbed the 'Reverse Mitigating Circumstances Schedule' - reads like a shopping list of implausible explanations presented by athletes in recent years. Pared of the legal language necessary to make the classes of excuse comprehensive, it includes classics such as:

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